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Archive (March - April 2006)
Sorry for the lack of updates lately. Things have been slow around here due to a slight case of Drew getting employed. But once he figures out his work schedule, and stuff, we'll be putting out more shit as usual. In the meantime, hang in there and enjoy... erm... this smiley :]
I just got the bill from our web host, and it's HUGE! I can't believe it. A month ago, we were getting less than 20 visitors a day to this site... coasting along with very minimal bandwidth usage. Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse. But soon after Woog got put up on WarcraftMovies.com... everything went a little bit on the insane side. Site traffic spiked to over 4,500 visitors/day, and Woog was downloaded an insane amount of time. Before long, we hit our bandwidth limit in a major way, and by the end of the month we were 115 gigs over the limit. At US$5.95 per gig... that ramps the bill to just about US$685!!! That's like... That's like totally insane!!! I honestly had no idea Woog would become that popular. Anyway, I don't exactly have that much money to spare (as evident by the teeny weeny itsy bitty budgets on our videos) so Jo and Cedric suggested that I sign up for a PayPal account so that people can start donating to help pay off that hefty bill. Yes folks, step right up and click on that button below, and donate to the Rescue Deadpan Entertainment Charity! It's kinda like the Save Ferris fund, except instead of Ferris Beuller there's us. We're not expecting to collect enough to cover all of that bill, but any little bit would help a lot. So if you liked Woog, if you're excited about the upcoming Legion of Haters and don't want to see it cancelled, or if you just like to check out our humble website, then dig out some of that loose change in your pocket and give it to us! Thanks!!!
We haven't been able to update for a bit because our hard drive decided to go fucky and pretty much almost failed on us over the weekend. It was pretty freaky, and Drew was so shit-scared he'd lose all his scripts and projects and everything. Moral of the story: Back-up early, back-up often. Although, one good thing to come out of it was spring-cleaning. Jo has always complained that Drew hoards too much old junk on his computer. Miscellaneous jpgs of funny stuff that he'll never look at, old application forms for government grants that have long since been denied to him... A whole lot of crap that that should have been deleted instead of taking up precious space. Anyway, because of that we couldn't update, and we couldn't send out the instructions on the how to be a hater stuff. But after tinkering around with a new hard drive, everything should be okay now and those of you in the mailing list should be getting those instructions soon.
While doing some research for The Legion of Haters, Drew and I started going through old video games as a source of inspiration. That was when I realized that old games really are the best. I totally missed playing stuff that didn't involve saving the world from aliens and shooting yet another terrorist in the head with a MP-5 submachinegun.
They just don't make games like those anymore. Simple, a joystick and two buttons sorta games. Everything these days requires two analogue sticks + 8 buttons or a mouse and keyboard, and involves deep deep gameplay that takes about 3 hours to get through a level. What happened to stuff you could just boot up and play for 5 mins while waiting for the next episode of Spongebob to start during the Spongebob-a-thon on Nick?
When Justin was over to shoot his scenes for Haters the other day, Drew was explaining to him the concepts for games like Bank Panic ("You're a sheriff in a bank, and you open doors and protect it from bandits") and Justin was just rolling his eyes. You see, Justin was born in the 90's. He grew up with games like Counter-Strike, Warcraft, and Grand Theft Auto. To him, an old game is something like Syndicate, Dune 2 or the original X-Com game (back when it was called UFO: Enemy Unknown). Anything beyond that is probably something like Pong. I'm not even sure if Justin has heard of Frogger (well, he probably has because of all the modern 3-D remakes). I'm not sure if he can even fathom the idea of games running on only 640kb of RAM! So Justin was quickly dismissing these games, saying "Okay this sounds boring, and you're starting to really really show your age. Isn't it time for you to like, watch Wheel of Fortune or something?" Well afterwards we got him to play Bank Panic, and he was like "Oh yeah this is pretty good stuff!" Score one for the old school games!
ALLEY CAT
In the later hours of the afternoon on the 10th of March, 2006, a spark ignited in the darkened recesses of N.E.W.T, a 60 gig hard drive housing all the music, images and documents in Drew's Computer. The spark led to a small electrical fire which slowly began devouring the inner parts of the hard-drive, unbeknownst to everyone. During a routine virus scan at around 1900 hrs, a disk-read fault was detected. Further investigation into the matter brought to light the full extent of the damage caused by the electrical fire. Irreversible damage was done to the drive-core, and it was only a matter of time before the core would reach critical failure, resulting in the complete destruction of N.E.W.T. A state of emergency was declared and evacuation procedures had begun all in every sector of the Hard Drive. Some of the older files had their data cloned during the Great Back-Up of 2004, but many of the younger and newer files were not cloned and had to be rescued or risk being lost forever. As part of the standard evacuation procedures, an external Seagate Unit was made active and docked with the main structure to take on the evacuees. Thousands of files crowded the USB cable in panic, desperately trying to claw their way out of the dying Hard Drive. Priority was given to mission-imperative files such as Drew's own screenplays and video-related images, as well as important files such as photos of Jo and favored MP3s. Other stubborn files simply refused to believe that their beloved Hard Drive could fail, and remained behind in their folders and switched themselves to Read-Only status. But N.E.W.T's structural integrity was degrading fast and entire sectors were failing, resulting in the loss of many files. The smaller files were able to escape through the cracks, but the more obese and less mobile files were unable to escape from the bad sectors and fit through the confines of the thin and narrow USB cable, despite numerous attempts to rescue them. Their wails and screams still plague the dreams of many a survivor. Notable amongst the casualties was a Conan the Barbarian MP3 and a Rodney Mullen video file. When all mission-imperative and favored files were safely evacuated to the Seagate Unit, a quick appraisal was conducted for the remaining files. Unfortunately, most of them (including the 3,500 Star Wars Galaxies program files) were decreed to be unworthy and ineligible for evacuation, sentenced to be left behind on the dying Hard Drive. At 230 hrs on the 11th of March 2006, the Seagate Unit disengaged the USB rescue cable from the main structure and sped away to a safe distance, leaving behind 50 gigs worth of files. Approximately 20 minutes later, N.E.W.T's drive-core reached critical failure and super-heated itself, resulting in a low-level thermal explosion that melted the computer desk and singed the wooden floor. The blast-wave also ripped the computer chair into 3 pieces, and generated a Electromagnetic Pulse that deactivated the nearby X-Box for 2 hours. Miraculously, the Computer housing N.E.W.T survived the explosion, along with all its main components (an older PCI 56K modem was not so lucky). The surivors attribute this to the strange unearthly nature of the Computer, long reputed to be contain a demonic presence. 18,000 files lost their lives when N.E.W.T reached critical failure. The files that survived the disaster started referring to the 11th of March as The Day of Reckoning . Over the next few days, a new Hard Drive was installed in the Computer, and the Seagate Unit started off-loading the refugees into their new home. Although scarred by the trauma and the loss of many old friends, the refugee files were eager to start over and leave the past behind. Eventually they gave the new Hard Drive a name: Unzervalt. It means, simply, "Our World."
I heard about Crash winning the Oscar for best film... and well... it's a bit of a let-down. I mean, I'm glad that a film starring Ludacris won, but still... I mean, Brokeback was a really really good film, even if you take out the gay cowboys part. Well, it wouldn't be the same without gay cowboys, but still... I feel that it's a bit of a cop-out by the voters.
Whoa! I just got that last update by Kimble translated, and it makes no sense! Bah!
Ich habe kürzlich, daß wir eine Menge europäische Besucher zum Aufstellungsort empfangen haben beachtet, so dachte ich, daß wir etwas tun sollten, sie fühlen zu bilden begrüßt. Hallo dort! Mein Name ist Kimble, und ich helfe, diesen Aufstellungsort zusammen mit einigen meiner anderen freunde laufen zu lassen. Ich finde es zu überraschen, daß so viele Deutsche die Web site jetzt besichtigen, weil wir nie deutsche Besucher vorher gehabt haben. Meine Statistiken erklären mir, daß Deutsche 24% von allen Besuchern jetzt bilden, mehr als die Amerikaner! Danke für das Besichtigen unserer bescheidenen Web site! Ich verstehe, daß dieses vermutlich grammatisch falsch ist, aber ich schreibe nicht Deutsches, so, das dieses ganz von einer freien internet website übersetzt wird. Ich entschuldige mich für alle merkwürdigen Sätze, aber dieses ist das beste, das ich tun kann. Diese Rants Seite ist der aktualisierteste Abschnitt des Aufstellungsortes, in dem wir unsere Gedanken und Widersprüche bekanntgeben. Sie sollten aus dem Produktion Tagebuch auch überprüfen, wohin wir oben alle Nachrichten über unsere neuesten videos setzen. Gut genießen Sie Ihren Aufenthalt! Dauern Sie bitte die Zeit, das Gast-Buch zu unterzeichnen und informieren Sie uns, was Sie an die Web site denken. Haben Sie einen schönen Tag! PS I übersetzte gerade diesen Text zurück in Englisch, und es ist kein sinnvoll! Scheiße!
Just when you thought that the flames can't get any worse than what xkore88 wrote, someone comes along with even more self-loathe and totally rips away at us. Check these comments out... I mean, not only are we insulted, but someone actually wants us to DIE. That's harsh! By the way, note the times of the postings... He's sitting there spending 5 minutes coming up with a harsher comment each time. --- "who ever makes this should die. worst thing ive ever seen havent seen a movie this sad in a long time." "didnt rate really was a complete waste of my time deleted asap" "oh and another thing, how the hell is this original i see movies every day of absolute smack tards acting out counterstrike or WoW or anything. This is like the 20th movie ive seen of retards acting out WoW and the 20th one i havent laughed @ and just thought "christ almighty these twats have the worst lives ever" really really REALLY u should think about the life ure taking.. and adjust it quick." --- How do you reply to something like that? "Erm... well... YOUR PUNCTUATION SUXXORS! hahahah omfgwtfpwned, nub!" What? Is there some kinda competition going on that I don't know about, where the aim is to make the harshest comment possible to insult us? What do you win from such a competition? A lifetime supply of KY jelly and a pair of surgical gloves? Or do these haters sit around somewhere, discuss their favorite flame-comments and try to out-do one another? I think it'll be like this. Oh yeah, the following flamage is drawn in a silly web-comic format, because people seem to like that Penny Arcade stuff. So yeah... enjoy! Especially you, Lukekritikalgreen! This one's for you!
I can't believe Munky has actually fallen to the trap of responding to those dumb flames. You'd think that he'd realize by now that nothing good ever comes out of these flame wars. Nobody gets any smarter, nobody gets beat down... the only people that suffer are the people who are actually trying to read informative posts on web forums, only to be forced to sift through endless pages of ignorant offensive remarks and counter-offensive bullshit. It's all bullshit! Just ignore the idiots, and eventually they'll find someone else to flame, or just go back to their safe haven of declaring every other Counter-strike player as being beneath them. Eventually, like all other losers, they'll end up going crazy from loneliness and lack of sexual intimacy, and either kill themselves after a particularly frustrating loss in a videogame or just collapse from hiding from reality in a videogame for 72 hours straight. And if that doesn't happen, their penises will probably wither and die from physical abuse and a lack of feminine attention... and in a fit of despair they'll sell their computers for plane tickets to Thailand where they'll spend the rest of their lives as lady-boys servicing the needs of richer internet forum trolls and old politicians. One way or the other, their flames will eventually die down... so stop provoking them!
Wanna do some ranting of your own? Then head to the Msg Forums and vent, or just sign the Guestbook!
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