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Archive (October-December 2005)
I have totally gotten a new hobby. Ever since stumbling across some midi sites, I have become obsessed with surfing the internet in search of old school midis, especially midis from old video games such as Sonic and Sim City 2000. Midis are the shit! Totally! Now every single one of my phone's ring tones is a theme from an old video game, from Puzzle Bobble to Chu-Chu Rocket. Midis are the new mp3s, I swear! Forget about digital music, turn back the clock and rejoice in the splendor of old synthesized midi tracks! ---
Oh, and the other day I was going through random websites doing some research for our new short flick, and I stumbled across this one about Ninjas, entitled Real Absolute Power. It's totally demented, and I really urge everyone to spend at least 15 minutes reading what appears to be the epitome of ignorance spliced with supreme entertainment value. Do read the Hatemail too... it's pretty fucking funny that people actually take this site so seriously. Either that or it's all doctored... who knows, and who cares? Just check out the site.
Last week, I saw a little girl of no more than 5-8 years old give her seat up so that a young couple could sit together on the bus. She just stood up, walked to her mom and brother sitting in the seat behind her, and squashed in together with them. When someone so young can muster up the generosity to give up her seat for someone else... and this is a young couple, I might add. Not a geriatric or a pregnant single mother of three carrying a big load of groceries, but a young fit couple in their mid-20's... Well, it really warms the heart and brings a sense of hope back into this world full of queue jumpers and people who let their kids piss into Disneyland's Swan lake. Merry Christmas, I guess.
Well, the new Dumbpics page is slowly opening up, and now we're ready to take submissions for the 2005 Dumbpics collection. More information is available on the page. So what are you waiting for? Check it out! --- Of interest to the average guy: Recently in Tampa, Florida, 2 (ex) members of the Carolina Panthers Cheerleading troupe were arrested in a bar fight just hours before they were supposed to perform in the Bucs/Panthers game. Witnesses have claimed that the barfight started because the two cheerleaders were holding up the lines in the toilets because they were having sex in a restroom stall. More information and photos can be found here.
"Where are those other two? How long could a toilet break last?"
The Nice and Decent Daredevil sent me a link recently... and it's really really just kinda weird. It's a couple of Chinese kids singing along to The Backstreet Boys' "I want it that way"... sounds kinda dumb, huh? But it's really hilarious! Trust me on this one... Just open the link and let it download for a while (because it seems to take forever to leech). Omigod these two guys are so funny! And the one on the left looks totally like Wong!
"I want it that way!"
Recently Drew got himself a new phone, one with a built-in camera AND a mobile version of Sonic the Hedgehog! Anyway, the big deal is that since the phone has a camera in it, and he always has his phone with him, that pretty much equates to always having a camera on him. Not only that, but just about everyone else has camera-phones these days... So I think it's pretty much the perfect time to resurrect the Dumbass Pics page! Now open for submissions too! It's not up yet, but it will be soon, so check the page for more details on how you too can upload pics of the weird-looking and annoying people that bug you.
Jo and I were flipping through the newspaper the other day, and they were doing their usual thing of publishing letters from readers about certain articles... and I was wondering just why some people even bother to write to the paper? I mean, sure it's nice to be able to express yourself and show that you have an opinion... but there's got to be more to it than that, right? I mean, this guy wrote in complaining about people who wear T-shirts with offensive words in public. He thinks they should be censored. After reading this, I envisioned a geeky 40 year old virgin who cringes whenever he sees cleavage, and physicially covers his eyes whenever a sex scene appears in a movie. When your opinions make you look like some total dweeb (now there's a word I haven't used in a while) wouldn't you want to hide your opinions? Or at least not sign the letter with your real name? And with this person being Chinese and all, don't you care about how bad this makes your family looks? Auntie Rosalind is going to read the paper, see your letter there, and the next time she sees your mom at a mahjong session she's going to say: "Hey Stella, your son's a fucking loser. What did you do to him when he was young? I wanna know because my daughter's pregnant and I don't want her to repeat the same mistakes you made and curse me with a grandchild as pathetic as your son. By the way, MAHJONG! OMFG, you got pwned, bitches!" How is your mom going to reply? And at the next family gathering, even if you can handle the abuse from your cousins... how are your parents going to explain themselves to your grandparents? Bottom line is: Start an anonymous blog if you have to. Or better yet, write in a physical pen and paper journal that you can keep hidden under your bed next to your 20-sided dice and your 2000 point Space-Ork miniature army. Freedom of speech is one thing, but this is for your own good because you're a fucking embarrassment to human society. --- You can read Jo's opinions on the matter at her blog here. She's also not too fond of these people.
You all know the scenario: You walk onto a bus, and there's a spare seat next to the window. Parked onto the aisle seat however, is a big and ugly ass belonging to some prick who won't budge, as if he or she is acting as some kinda barrier to prevent you from getting that seat. Now is it really too hard to move your fat ass over a few inches into the window seat? Or are you like really attached to aisle seats or do you have some major phobia or the window seat? Either way, if you really have to sit on the aisle seat, how about just standing up for a few seconds so that someone else can have an easier time squeezing into the window seat? Or are you just really so fucking lazy that you can't do anything, you dumb arrogant ugly piece of shit? Fast forward twenty minutes or so, and you've arrived at your stop. You push the button to signal the bus driver, and the asshole sitting next to you does absolutely nothing. You clear your throat loudly and say "Excuse me" while you make it very obvious that it's your stop and you would like to alight from the bus. What's the asshole do? Once again, absolutely nothing. Maybe if he or she was feeling particularly generous, they'll maybe shift over so their knees are facing the aisle, which would maybe free up a few inches of squeezing space. Honestly, why can't you just stand up for a few seconds to accommodate someone trying to get off the bus? Are you afraid of losing your seat or something? It's like for just a few seconds. A few seconds of effort will allow the person next to you to get off the bus that much sooner, so that you can once again have the entire seat to support your enormous ass. Why are people so fucking lazy? Gawd, maybe if they would just spend the extra teeny bit of effort to stand up and give way every now and then, they might actually lose some weight and people won't have such a hard time trying to squeeze past their gigantic calves and fatty knees! --- By the way, to the annoying customer by the name of Aoi Kimura, return our copy of Mean Girls to the fucking video store now! Everytime I call this bitch up, she hangs up immediately when I mention her long-overdue videos. And when we call her back, the voice on the phone will mysteriously have changed to another person who has no idea who Aoi Kimura is. Do you really think we're that dumb? Dumb tricks like that might work on your chemistry teacher with the fondness for under-aged girls in pleated skirts, but you honestly insult us by trying that shit on us. I'm getting so sick of these fucking rich kids who come into the store all the time. Kids whose financial future is so secure that they don't bother studying at school, and instead choose to waste their time by bothering the world with their Alicia Silverstone and Simple Plan-esque dress sense. Baggy shorts and long socks is never a good look, no matter which 1-dimensional punk/rock band is currently top of the pop charts.
We had a screening over at Club 95 last night, and they played Bad Karma and The Fourth Place on the screen to a small crowd. We just wanna thank everyone who turned up to support the films, and I think everyone had a good time just chilling out to the free booze. Yep, for contributing films for their weekly short film screening we got 4 jugs of beer, which would make this our first paying job hahahaha! I mean, for one of our short films anyway... the corporate stuff doesn't really count, does it? We'll probably do this again in the future, as soon as Drew can figure out which other films to compile into a 20 min showcase. Drew Kombat, NSkate Ver 3, what else?
Aaron's been in town for the last 10 days or so, hanging out with us in sunny Singapore. Which sorta does explain our limited presence in Warcraft and the infrequent updates on the site... but anyway, I just wanted to say that I pwned him in Ultra Bust-a-Move! Nevermind that he repeatedly beat me at Pirates... but hey Bust-a-Move is where skillz are proven. Okay, that was just pretty random... BTW the new Mortal Kombat game is pretty cool :]
Have you ever noticed how there seems to be some kinda protocol when it comes to slapping someone? I'm not much of a domestic violence kinda guy, so I've never actually slapped anybody. But if I did, I wonder if I would do it the stereotyped way. Likewise, I don't really know any domestic violence types, so I don't know how they slap each other. I've noticed that whenever a girl slaps a guy, it's always a tight forehand slap with lots of wrist-action. Same for when a girl slaps another girl, although that's traditionally followed by hair-pulling and name-calling. When a guy slaps a girl though, it's more like a backhand slap, with a locked wrist, a big wind-up and plenty of follow through. More like a tennis swing. Guys don't seem to slap other guys, but I figure it'll be much the same way. Now why's that? Is it just fake Hollywood imagery? Or is it just something natural? Like how babies naturally laugh when they're happy? Maybe guys just naturally backhand girls and girls just can't help but forehand guys. I wonder what's more effective? I mean, if you get a guy and a girl of equal strength, and let them go at it in a bitch-fighting contest, who would win? I mean, if you were not allowed to strike the other person in any other way than the assigned slap-style, would the strong backhanding male win, or the quick forehanding female kick his ass? Sure a good backhand would pack a big punch, but a lot of quick forehand slaps could do the trick too. Like Zangief going up against Chun Li.
So who would win? Which slapping style would be better? Or is this another one of those stupid battle of the sexes questions?
The other day, I overheard Jo talking to Drew about her classmates who kinda left her stranded for some uni group assignment when they refused to do any work and screwed up the assignment. And these were her exact words: "I can't believe it! They're such noobs! I'm going to find another group next time. I'm not going to carebear these nubs anymore." Then afterwards, when they went to play pool she goes: "I'm going to own you." Now Jo is NOT a gamer. The closest thing she does to gaming is play The Sims 2, and only on occasion at that. Yet she's now adopted 1337 terminology into her vocabulary. It's scary. The word "noob" is going to be the next "what-ever!" I mean, look up the word leet on Wikipedia and you're going to find a huge huge huge entry on the origins of 1337, along with the proper usage of leetspeek and all the grammatical rules etc. Someone took the time to write all that. Someone had enough research and information to write all that. Leetspeek is no longer confined to gamerz and haxxors now. Regular civilians are picking it up, and soon it's going to spread to the whole world and soon everyone will be speaking leetspeek! That can't be right! It's a horrible language used by bratty ganky kids to exact some kinda superiority over people with normal-sized penises and active sex-lives. Besides, if everybody starts speaking leet, then what will the kiddies do to compensate for their little pee-pees? Stop the madness! Stop the madness now!
Shit, one of these days I'm going to hear Jo say: "ph33r me, for I am teh ub3r roxxors and I will pwn j00!"
Without a doubt the big news around here is the upcoming completion of our new video, the World of Offline Gaming. After spending a bit too long in limbo, it's almost entirely done. All that's needed now is a re-recording of Hanxiang's lines in the new Kill-Stealing chapter, and we'll be all set. I'm really quite happy with it, and it should do pretty well. In case you haven't already seen it, Drew Kombat is also up and working on the site. That's been given a pretty warm reception, so I'm pretty up for taking that idea and expanding it to something bigger. Like an ongoing series of short episodes or something... I'll call it Suburban Kombat! --- It's true that we haven't been updating the site much at all lately, and we're going to rectify that immediately. Can't become one of those dead internet sites that just uses up webspace, right? Anyway, keep checking back. We'll update more often from now on.
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